In the Bible we can only find one incident in which a father cried over his son.  It’s King David, who cried over the death of his son, Absalom (2 Samuel 18:33).  He wished it were he who had died in stead of his son.  It’s an expression of regret for not doing more to prevent the family’s mayhem from happening.  Had he been more decisive to Amnon for raping Tamar, full sister of Absalom, maybe all this havoc would not have happened.  Had he been fairer to his son and embraced Absalom after he returned from self-imposed exile after he avenged Tamar by killing Amnon, perhaps this great tragedy would have been averted. By wishing it were he who had died in stead of Absalom, David expressed his guilt.  He could have and should have done more but he didn’t. He failed as a father.

Many men can relate to David.  Many enjoy success in their careers, but many can’t say the same about their families, about their roles as fathers.  Many of us carry this load of guilt for not doing enough or for doing what we should not.  So, blessed is the man who can walk through life with his head up and hands down, who can say humbly that by the grace of God he has done what he should.  He is like, “a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season, whose leaf also shall not wither, and whatever he does shall prosper” (Psalm 1:3).  Please note that the psalmist is correctly describing a man who “walks not in the counsel of the ungodly” and whose “delight is in the law of the Lord.”  Such a man, such a father is what the world—and the children—needs more than ever before.

If I may add, not only delights in the Lord, but also in his family. May this brief poem in Streams in the Desert remind us of what is truly important in life, “Measure your love by loss and not by gain, not by the wine drunk, but by the wine poured forth.  For love’s strength stands in love’s sacrifice, and he who suffers most has most to give.

Pastor Paul