Having been married to Santy for nearly 39 years, I have learned a few things about marriage.  I learned that marriage is hard work.  Anybody who says that marriage is a piece of cake is either a perfect man who can do anything, or is lying, or blind to his spouse’s needs, or simply doesn’t care.  But we, who are not perfect, honest, can still see and care, will readily admit that marriage is hard work.

I have also learned that marriage is not for everyone. It requires a set of traits to make marriage work, such as being flexible, faithful, and able to see the other person’s mind and heart.  Conversely, we, who are rigid and unwilling to change, or unfaithful will absolutely be miserable and along the way, make our spouse miserable as well.

And here is another one: Marriage requires dogged persistence.  It is not for quitters.  We, who give up easily, will not be able to keep our marriage for long.  Not only are we to be ready to deal with new issues as we cruise through life, but we are also to be willing to revisit the same issues over and over until we get them resolved.

This is the last one: Marriage does not only meet our deepest need and most intimate longing for a relationship, but it also gives us a great reward of joy.  And joy is the stuff that we need to wake up each day and face what comes our way.  And out of this joy comes this gratefulness to God for uniting us with this wonderful person.

Bill McCartney, the former University of Colorado’s football coach and the cofounder of Promise Keepers, says, “If you really want to know about a man and what kind of character he has, you need only look at the countenance of his wife.  Everything he has invested, or withheld, will be there.”  It is of course true the other way around, but the point is simple: We are as we thanks to our spouse. 

Pastor Paul